Thursday, February 21, 2013

Grandiose

Tribal peoples feel a shift in the earth's magnetism, astronomers note an increased rate of expansion of the universe, and North Korea launches a celebratory missile trial, landing just short of the state of Hawaii. Why? You know why. I, Ray Ray Montoya, have deigned to return from my self imposed exile in order to inform, entertain, and enlighten you.

 I talk to the the people, the masses, the fan base and other whom I must inspire. They occasionally enlighten me regarding a word the people or hipsters are familiar that I am not. One such word is "shipping," have you heard of it? As I understand it, "shipping" is a verb that refers to fan-fiction that pairs together two characters who never quite "sealed the deal" in authorized shows or publications. For instance, pre-season 7 Agent Scully and Agent Mulder action is "shipping." In the same vein, fan written speculations involving Captain Picard loving down Dr Crusher would also be shipping. I had never heard the term until someone used it, and I demanded explanation. After that, I began to see it everywhere.

Facebook, like an increasingly less satisfying drug, is hard to stay away from. From a logophile standpoint, Facebook is only interesting in that it generates new terminology all the time! It seems many conspiratorial women (sorry, too much meth in my cornflakes) maintain "frenemies" on their friend's lists, those who are acknowledged in public for reasons economic and social, but who are secretly distrusted and kept close because close is where one keeps her enemies. Sexist of me? A woman tells me that this is done because being friends with the friends of friends maintain peace. Perhaps, and to be fair, my stupid little  conclusion has not been peer reviewed. To be even more fair, I know of men who have had their bosses on the friends list-never a good idea. In some cases, it's cost a dude dearly.

Another word? "Vaguebook" I think that word is self explanatory-one someone posts something intentionally vague and out of context on Facebook. For example, if I were to say "kisses that taste like barley soup" people might think I'm actually making a serious point or referring to an event in my life. Wrong!  I have just recently made a policy of not committing the sin of Vaguebook because I don't want to  be accused of spreading rumors, gossip, what have you, and our words are more important than we seem to think in "The West."

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